Sunday, February 13, 2011

Questions in the name of love...

Playing number two, whether due to the feeling or belief of not being able to get any better or just not wanting to commit to anyone, most people will play this role. Who are we to judge someone else's actions or reasons? You can't help who you love, even if they love someone else. Isn't it true that most number twos want to eventually become number one? Isn't that why most people stay in these relationships? With the hopes of the person they love leaving the one they are with to eventually be with them? (Notice I am saying "most" because I know this does not apply to everyone.) How long do you sit around and wait to become number one though? Should you just continue to "live in the moment" for as long as the moment lasts? But what about those lonely nights when you are yearning to be touched and they are at home touching and being touched? What about those spare of the moments when you need someone to talk to but they are not available because they are talking to their number one? When other people flirt with you do you flirt back? Do you go out on dates with other people? Are these things against the code? Is there even a code for these situations? Is it even cheating? How do you commit to someone that is "committed" to someone else? What do you do when someone else is yearning to make you their number one? Do you let go of your part time love and take a chance at 100% love? Is that grass possibly greener on the other side? When it becomes a question of what you are worth, what is the question? Are you worth taking a chance at love or are you worth more than being number two? What happens if you eventually become number one? How do you go from number two to being number one and truly trust that person? The chances we take for love.

IS IT REALLY LOVE?

Who turned off the air in here? Why does it feel like the walls are closing in on me? I can't breathe. I want to cry some more but the pain in my chest hurts so much. I'm praying and praying to GOD to take this pain away. Where are you GOD? Why didn't you send me someone who was going to love me right? This person here just keeps breaking my heart over and over again. I can't do this anymore. I won't do this anymore. Its OVER.
Raise your hand if you've ever felt THAT before. Being in love can make you feel anew. It can make you feel like anything is possible. You feel like you can reach up and touch the clouds. You look at this person as your savior, the one that came in and saved you from giving up on love. But love can also make you feel low. So low that you feel like the world is going to end at any given moment. Like nothing matters anymore. All those things he/she opened you up to suddenly becomes obsolete. Why does love hurt so much? How does the heart know to feel pain like that? But then again if people love you so much then why would they want you to feel that hurt? Is it really love?
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From the heart of The BlackButterfly

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

COLD HEART

WOW it is so COLD out today. I wish I could have stayed in my bed under my warm covers. How many of us wished that? So many other people aren't so lucky to be granted that wish. Have you ever seen a homeless woman out in the cold with her children? That is one of the most heartbreaking feelings ever. To watch the expressions on the faces of those children. They are COLD and hungry. We look to our parents as children to fix any and every problem. Imagine that mother's heart because she know that is a problem that she cannot fix. She has to depend on the scraps of food that people threw in the garbage to feed her children. She relies on the change that she gets from begging people for help. She has to find the warmest place in the Cold to try and keep her kids alive. How do you explain that to your kids? How do you look them in their eyes and tell them it's going to be ok? I stand outside for five minutes and I'm begging to get out of it. Imagine those kids. They don't have no inside to run to. My heart aches for all the homeless during this time of the year, but my soul cries for those children. They say that most of us are only a paycheck or two away from being homeless, so why not take heed and do what you need to do to make sure you and your kids have a back up plan? How did it ever get this way? Who dropped the ball in helping our country? How do we fix it? Can we fix it? I don't know the answer but I do know how much my heart hurts every time I see a child on those cold streets.
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From the heart of The BlackButterfly

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

I DIDN'T KNOW I WAS A QUEEN

I didn’t know I was a QUEEN until I was treated as such. I won’t say that my mother dropped the ball on my, but what I will say is this: Parents teach and show your daughters that they are worthy of a KING and should not be settling for anything less. Teach her how to treat a man. Parents teach your sons how a KING should walk, talk and behave. Teach him how to treat a woman. My mother taught me the importance of being independent, of how to take care of myself and to reach for perfection. I thank her for that. I have been through men after men. I have been treated both great and bad. After being touched and loved by a true MAN I now realize that those past relationships were just God’s way of preparing me to get this one right.
I didn’t know I was a QUEEN until he kissed the tip of my crown, until he kissed away my tears. Until her taught me to never fear. I didn’t know I was a QUEEN until I heard him refer to me as one and then turn around and explain why he felt this way about me. I didn’t know I was a QUEEN until he kissed the ground before me and told me that THAT was what he worshipped. Until he made me believe that I could fly I stayed grounded. Until he moved the mountains from my path, I stayed stationary. Until he woke me up from my nightmare I stayed asleep. Until he drew the blueprint of my goals on a sheet of paper, I continued to dream. Until he gave me his heart, I feared love. Until he told me and treated me like his QUEEN, I didn’t know I was a QUEEN.
True love is hard to find. Why? Because we have yet to begin to love ourselves. Tell me you love me all day every day, but it’s for YOU to believe it. We are ALL KINGS and QUEENS, we just have to start acting like such.

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From the heart of The BlackButterfly

Sunday, February 6, 2011

MAKING HISTORY

We often say to our children "I am so proud of you", but can your children really say the same about you? I challenge you to sit with your kids and talk to them about who they look up to. YOU should be your child's hero and their inspiration. What are your doing to inspire your children? There is nothing wrong with teaching our children about MLK Jr., Booker T. Washington, Sojourner Truth, Harriet Tubman, etc etc. It's great to know your past but how about YOU show your children first hand, up close and personal how to become amongst the greatest ever lived. In a world where people are judged either by the color of their skin, their economic background, the zip code they live in, their style of clothing or their sexual preference; how do you teach your child to overcome? Do your children know that just by being born that they have already made history? He or she was another Black child born "technically" free from slavery. In honor of our ancestors that lived in the times of slavery, we should be teaching our children that they can be whatever they want to be by freeing their minds. Pay attention to your children and don't allow their brains to be washed by society's expectations of us. Society expects us to help them control the population of blacks by killing ourselves. They try to put a cap on how far in life we should be able to go. Don't give them that victory. Many of our children are lost due to lack of guidance. It is time to set the bar and teach our children that the sky is their limit. How do we teach them? By showing them. If you are hanging out in the club, what are your teaching your children? If you are a professional welfare recipient, what are your expectations of your children? If you are crack head or alcoholic, don't just roll the dice and pray for a better future for your children, you have to do better and show them. There are many blacks to date making history. Make your child one of them.
True Story: My son came and told me that he chose to present me to his class for Black History Month. He drew the logo for my Radio Show and told his class how I am famous and that I am making history. I knew that I inspired my son but I didn’t know that I inspired him THAT much. I corrected him and told him that I wasn’t famous and he told me that I was to him and that one day I will be to everyone else.
Moral of this story is be someone that your child can be proud of and in return they will be someone that you will be proud of. To expect Greatness, you must first exemplify greatness.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

FIND THE BRIGHTER SIDE

Who does God think I am? Am I really that bad of a person that he has to put the burden of life on MY shoulders? If that was going to be the case, then why didn't he send me a husband or a wife to help me carry some of this weight? Why did he have to make me so ugly? Why couldn't I be beautiful with flawless skin and long flowing hair? Why did I have to be fat? Why couldn't he have given me a coca cola shaped body? Why Why Why???
So many people walk around singing these songs. Questioning why this and why that. We are all perfectly perfect, uniquely made by God himself. Not your mother or your father, but by GOD. He knew before you were planted what you were going to look like and what challenges he was going to present you with. TRUST that when he brings you to it, he will bring you through it. Now I know that can be incredibly hard to believe at times and no one really wants to hear that when they are unhappy. But someone once said to me "If you are feeling down, overweight, depressed or ugly... You don't have to look it because the you add to your problems and authenticate what you are feeling." Real talk. If you want things to turn around then you have to have faith and learn to look at the "brighter" side of things. Fuck what everyone else says about you or how you handle your situation because when they go home you are still faced with that situation. We were all created winners. What you choose to win at is all up to you. If you don't like something CHANGE IT TO YOUR LIKING.. POINT! BLANK! PERIOD!

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

CELEBRATE YOUR BLACKNESS

Here we are, another year of celebrating Black History Month. Yelling, ranting and raving about how we only get one month to celebrate. And they gave us the shortest month in the year. Whatever!!! Why do we always wait until January to sing this song? Is this really that big of an issue for you? If so then why not sing your injustice from the mountain tops in June or August? Right! TV shows get prepared to play the same Ol' movies they play every year. Radio Stations prepare their line ups of the leaders that they wish to honor. There's nothing wrong with that but how about this; honor your leaders all year long, not just in February. We want our children to know Our History right? So why not teach them. I heard a mom say to me "my daughter is failing Social Studies, but that wasn't my strong subject either". At the same time she's mad because the school is teaching "HIS" Story and not "OUR" Story. Well how about YOU teach your children? Every year the focus is on the same people, again nothing wrong with honoring those leaders, however, what happened to honoring those leaders that came after them? Shouldn't we be adding to that list of Greatness? We have great leaders from ten years ago from our own backyards. Honor them. Honor that Leader still making history today. Encourage your children to make history. You can't cry about "the white man" not respecting us as a people or not respecting our history when we don't honor, respect or recognize ourselves. If we want to be loved and respected as Black Men, Black Women or even a Human Beings then maybe we would show people WHY we should be loved and respected as Black Men, Black Women and Human Beings. Honor, Encourage and Recognize your Black Brothers and Sisters not just in February, but Make OurStory EVERYDAY.